PANGARAP

by Paolo Escobar

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about

PANGARAP is the Tagalog word for "hope" or "dreams". This album is very representative of all the influences I've had musically and as a person, and I'm lucky to be able to have an outlet to let folks into what it's like to live in my shell.

This release also marks 30 years of life for me and 25 years pursuing my true love of making music. It has been 10 years since my last album release and I am proud to be able to present this to all of you. Please enjoy and here's to 30 more years of sharing my life with you thru this medium!

credits

released March 29, 2017

All tracks written, performed and produced by Paolo Escobar.

Engineering and co-production on "I Want It All" by Javier Valdeavellano

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Paolo Escobar Seattle, Washington

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Track Name: Always (Even If I'm Not)
V1:
I could always pretend
And just smile
When you ask
If I'm okay
But somewhere deep in my heart
Lies the truth
There's no use
There is no way
That I could be around
When I found you
I thought that you would stay
But when you ask me
If I am alright
Ooh I lie
And I say

Chorus:
"Always"
Even if I'm not
Yes I say
"Always"
Even if I'm not
Okay

V2:
There are some day I pray
This heartbreak
Would just please go away
And I feel it ain't just
So i just
Turn my face towards my Faith
Begging
Asking for some assistance
To distance
My heart from this pain
But I can't keep away
So I stay
And say simple and plain

(CHORUS)

Coda:
Please Old Cupid
Just leave me 'lone
Wish my heart was made of stone
Guess this all has driven me insane
Cuz my reply will always stay the same

(CHORUS)
Track Name: I Got Soul
V1:
I've broken bread with the best of 'em
And I got tired of 'em promisin'
That I'd be handed the world on a silver plate
But they don't

But it don't matter
Cuz what I got is worth more the weight
Of all the gold I appreciate
Y'all trying to make it better with all your words
But I know...

C:
I got soul (3x)
Now you know

V2:
My papa told me that when I'm grown
A plant'll grow where the seed was sown
And I been waiting for it but truth be told
I been sure

You see my mama she told me, "boy,
You better get on with all that noise,
God gave you a thing so go use that voice
For His Throne!"
So I thank you Lord that...

(CHORUS)
(BRIDGE)

V3:
I've cut my teeth on the hardest steel
But I know life it gets harder still
No it never gets easy to turn the wheel
Least I know..

(CHORUS)
Track Name: The Awful Truth
V1:
Ever since you've gone
I really feel I've grown
Just a little
Cuz everything's been gold
Without me being so damn sentimental
But..

CHORUS:
Ooooooh I miss you
And ooooh though I just been silent
Life just ain't right without you
And I know I've got to face the truth

V2:
Ever since you've gone
You can be damn sure
I've been livin'
Cuz everything's been gold
And I'm thankful for what I been given
But..

(CHORUS)
..that you ain't gone back to me
So why won't you set my heart free?

Bridge:
I guess baby I
Just gotta let go
But..

(Chorus)
Track Name: And I (When It's Over)
Why i keep tryin to hold your hand
When its over
Escapes me when you ask
For reasons far beyond my means
Of understanding
I guess I'll wear the mask

I wish that I could just explain
In simple terms
What I'm feeling
I wish that I could just pretend
That it's all over
My heart grows colder

Cause I want to be your love
Want to feel your touch
I cant get enough
Of you
And I want to feel alive
Want to be by your side
I can never hide
From you

The fact that I still call your name
When it's over
Has been a living hell
Guess I'm just tired being alone
As I get older
The farther down I dwell

I wish that I could just remain
Here as your friend
But I am feeling
That it goes deeper as we go
And I keep falling
I want to let you know

That I want to be your love
Want to feel your touch
I cant get enough
Of you
And I want to feel alive
Want to be by your side
I can never hide
From you
Track Name: I See Them
Wasn't it enough
To go through fire
And burn while standing still
Bringing bacc the memory
Of wars we fought together
And the thrill
Of seeing children fall
In the name of what we yearned for
And seeking for the promises that they don't keep
We learned hard

And i see them
In my dreaming
In the city triggered by the sounds
Yes i see them
Vivid as right now
And i see them
In my waking
In the tracks left in the snow
And i feel them
In the winter's bitter cold

Wasn't it enough
To hear the cries of mother begging still
Bringing out anxiety for which we're given pills
Telling us we're crazy
When they've never felt the gravity of death
Imprinted on the mind that keeps replaying times we bled

And i see them
In my dreaming
In the city triggered by the sounds
Yes i see them
Vivid as right now
And i see them
In my waking
In the tracks left in the snow
And i feel them
In the winter's bitter cold

(Screaming Bridge)

And i see them
In my waking
In the tracks left in the snow
And i feel them
In the winter's bitter cold
Track Name: It's Over
I guess its over
I guess its really really over
Was feeling love drunk
But now I'm kinda feeling sober
I thought you saved me
For you my loving I been saving
But no matter what my body do
My heart be out here misbehaving
You never wanted
It anyway
And now I'm leaving
And I'll be taking
My love I know you won't be grieving

Baby I don't
Get it at all
Tell me I'm great
But then you turn around and never ever let your heart fall
No baby I won't
Let you do me wrong
I know you dont intend on it
But honey you been playing with my heart for too long

I guess its over
I guess its really really over
Was feeling love drunk
But now I'm kinda feeling sober
I thought you saved me
For you my loving I been saving
But no matter what my body do
My heart be out here misbehaving
You never wanted
It anyway
And now I'm leaving
And I'll be taking
My love I know you won't be grieving

Baby I don't
Don't understand
Why after all the things that you and I had been through you ain't gave me a chance
Baby I can't
Take it no more
Cuz I done gave you all my heart and you done broke it and left it on the floor
Track Name: Just What Is (4C)
V1:
On a Monday she told me, "this must end,
And maybe later on Paolo we could be friends"
I paused and took a second and said "that depends
On what you really want with me baby now what's your plan?"
Is it to keep me as support on the hard days
Cuz I'm not really up to that child's play
Its really getting hard to just keep sane around you
Its hard to
Refocus my mind when I found truth I gots to
Dip if that is what you want me to do
But I'm thinking of all the times we would
Go out to a view
And kicc it til like 3 am
You see I am
Reminiscing on things we had
Good things we have
I'm guessing you won't be too sad
Won't be too bad
To leave but memories stay stashed
I leaf through past
You came and went away too fast
Shame came at last
I scramble at the thought of that
I mean it
I mean with everything we had been through
Permeating my mental
Clarity is essential
To picc away at the central
Thesis of our time
Together in the sublime
Narrative of it all
Surpassing reason or rhyme
Hoping that we could find
The answer to asking "why?"
The instant we get to that
The quicker we can define
Just what it is that we want from another human
So before you look away
I think you better zoom in
And tell me...

Chorus:
Just what is
Holding you bacc from us
Tell me so I could make sense
Of why you concluded that it is too much
For you to open up your heart's door
When we're so close our souls touch
Still I wait for your answer
Until I turn grey and bleed rust
Just what is

V2:
I hope you don't mistake this for just another song
Another shot at making making progress or to push it along
But really i wanted to ask what it is making you pass go
Past forces beyond our control like you knew the passcode
To my heart
But then chose to forget
And I start
To feel the regret
Of telling you
Now I'm feelin upset
But i wont take bacc what had been said
Cuz it's important that you know that I owe you a debt
Of gratitude
Because of you I know that I could still feel
Because of you I know my heart ain't sealed and that it could still heal
And that it could potentially feel loved and be loving
Because of you I find myself in a mode of discovering me again
Now I know I can decipher when love is pretend
Or if it's real depending on the work I put in
And now i know the value of words and the value of trust
And the value of just doing me cuz i know its a must
Because of you and the fact that you came into my view
During a year that made me fear of meeting somebody new
During a time that I felt that everything's coming at me
You made me realize I still got strength to be happy
But tell me..

Chorus:
Just what is
Holding you bacc from us
Tell me so I could make sense
Of why you concluded that it is too much
For you to open up your heart's door
When we're so close our souls touch
Still I wait for your answer
Until I turn grey and bleed rust
Just what is (4x)
Track Name: Oh Lord!
V1:
Oh Lord
We're lost
Seems hope
Been gone
I pray
You hear
Our pleading
Our tears
Cuz if not then..

Chorus:
What are we here for?
Great Allah
Can You hear our prayer
Show us what's in store
And dear God
Can You please take us there?
Cuz it's out of control
Can You please take us home?
Hear our prayer!

V2:
Oh Lord!
We're lost
And paying
The cost
Of going
Astray
So won't you please
Show us a better way
Cuz if not then..

(CHORUS)

RAP:
Oh Lord! Hear me!
Once again history's repeating
Itself on it's head
Its' antecedent is ignored by the powers that be
They power trippin'
Forgot we siblin's
So now we killin' each other
God we need your healin'
Somewhere along the road we lost the feeling
Of peeling back layers revealing to us what's really needed
Spiritual progress and unity
Oneness of humanity
We're drawn to insanity
Motivated by nothing bigger than salary
It's sad to be a human in these times
It's sad to just keep trying
It's sad that we need signs
But really on knees I'm begging Lord please release us from these difficulties
Why do we have to stoop this low?
Burning slow from the path we've chose
Lost our souls in the seeds we've sown
Questionin' the unknown 'bout

(CHORUS 2x)
Track Name: I Want It All
V2:
It doesn't cost much to live and die
Just your life
On the dotted line
We build it up just to watch it burn
But still hands turn
So how've you gone and spent your time?

Chorus:
See I
I want it all
I've worked too hard
Just to fall
Yes I
I've worked too hard
See all my scars?
I want it all
I want it all

V2:
The fire's devouring everything
It burns and runs
All through my veins
I leave my fears, joys, and all my pain
In these words
And on this page

(Chorus)
(Bridge)
(Chorus)
Track Name: I Want It All (demo version)
V2:
It doesn't cost much to live and die
Just your life
On the dotted line
We build it up just to watch it burn
But still hands turn
So how've you gone and spent your time?

Chorus:
See I
I want it all
I've worked too hard
Just to fall
Yes I
I've worked too hard
See all my scars?
I want it all
I want it all

V2:
The fire's devouring everything
It burns and runs
All through my veins
I leave my fears, joys, and all my pain
In these words
And on this page

(Chorus)
(Bridge)
(Chorus)